Words that must remain unspoken...

What Not To Say !!!

It was a just a simple talk with someone that made me cogitating about the  importance of unspoken words or simply say that at times we must know what not to say. Not only because it avoids offending the other person but also to make us act more humane.

We are social animals and aren't we ?? We grow up with kids, live with family, work with colleagues and enjoy with friends. We thrive in society and it sustains us too. And thus, we should be very cognizant of our words and actions. Mentioned below are a few situations where we should control our words.

# Avoid bragging about yourself #
Don't be of the type who keep gasconading about themselves, their achievements, their extraordinary feats. These kind of people keep blowing their trumpets like horns in the traffic that make ears go deaf. Don't be hungry for appreciation.
At times, the situation demands us to put forward our achievements and we must do that, but there should be modesty and graciousness. We must work hard for ourselves, for our improvement, must help others in need. It gives us a sense of fulfillment, a sense of satisfaction. And, if we have done something 'good', appreciation comes on its own from friends and family. Appreciation is something that is given not asked.

# Avoid saying words that make people feel disheartened #
Put yourself in shoes of someone who has failed miserably despite continuous efforts. Would you like being treated as a loser ?? Or would you like something that boosts your mettle and revitalizes you.
If you go near someone who has faced defeat and is disheartened, utter words that make him regain the lost strength, re-energize his mind, body and soul. I feel that sympathizing with him/her does nothing except reminding the person of his/her loss. So, don't you utter a word that makes him realize his defeat.
Choosing words that infuse a sense of enthusiasm and perseverance can do hell lot of good for the crestfallen person.
Words can be morale boosters. Choose it wisely.

# Avoid saying words that are critical of others #
Some people tend to be more critical of others, finding faults in each and everything of others. If you really have found some, keep it to yourself. No one asked to give a pompous speech about it. And then, there are a few people who just enjoy picking faults in others and when they find themselves in a group (all of fault-finders) they just relish it.
First of all, we must scrutinize ourselves before scrutinizing others. When there is a plethora of blemishes within ourselves, do we deserve to be judgmental of others.
Should you need to tell someone anything, tell him in a way that he recognizes and realizes them but not get offended. Put yourself in others' shoes before criticizing/commenting on others.

# Avoid telling a friend of yours of his disability #
If a friend is in anyway, disabled, don't make him feel pity by using words of sympathy. Don't tell him that he is considered different. Just let him blend in the group as others. But don't forget his problem. Treat him, tell him and enjoy with him as any another person in the group. This way he would, at least, for sometime, not feel biased, not feel cheated by God.
We must be thankful to God that we are good and abled. And then, I have met people, who are abled yet so 'disabled'.

# Avoid making fun of others #
Now this is very subtle. In no way, I am saying that we must avoid cracking jokes with friends and having fun. But what must be taken care of, are words that may hurt someone. Sometimes people tend to get much personal and start commenting vehemently in a way that could lacerate someone's feelings. People should desist from commenting in this fashion. When someone starts doing this, the onus is on others to stop this happening.
Sarcasm in words should be strictly avoided.

# Avoid making promises which u can't keep #
Promises must be kept. If we can't keep our words, we should not give our words also.
Once we have promised something, we must try our level best to achieve it. Words do matter and people would definitely judge you seeing whether you kept your promise (or at least tried to achieve it) or not.
The best practice would be to avoid making one, if you can't keep it.

# Avoid saying "No" to people asking for help #
Helping others in no way will weaken, impoverish or belittle us, but on the other hand, might support  the one in need. So, if we are not very much busy, we must listen and try to assist the ones who need our help.
Helping others give a sense of contentment and peace. Also, good deeds would definitely return to us with good omen, in one way or the other.

# Avoid saying words that are disparaging of the fairer sex #
In a society like ours, where discrimination with women is still prevalent, our women have to face many prejudices and discrimination. From female foeticide to discrimination, from illiteracy to illegal trafficking, from facing eve teasing to lewd and sexist comments, our women actually have to face more than what meets the eyes. Despite all the odds being faced, today they are playing an important role in the development of our society and country.
Avoid doing something or uttering words that exemplify the above. We should give them an environment free of any disparity and bias.Treat them with respect, protect them and give them their worth. Rather we should be thankful and proud of them because they are not only beautiful but are strong too.

Above are a few situations where we must exercise control over our words and select them with utter care.
You can be a very successful person but if you don't keep these small things in mind, you can never be a good human being !!!